


Beachstuck Striders feat. Dirk's Questionable Ideas and Their Consequences

by Doodlana



Category: Homestuck, MS Paint Adventures
Genre: Also very light, Anal Sex, Animal anatomy, Asphyxiation, Because hemipenis, Belly Bulging, Blood, Breathplay, But he doesn't die because he's smart, Cum Inflation, Double Penetration, Drowning, I'm not sure if it is but I'll tag it, Kissing, M/M, Pain, Rough Sex, Zoophilia, beastiality, but not a lot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-31
Updated: 2017-08-31
Packaged: 2018-12-22 04:16:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11959518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Doodlana/pseuds/Doodlana
Summary: Dirk's a boy, Hal's an android shark. This is a joke that went too far.Dirk isn't relaxed, even when on vacation, but Hal decides to push him into a slightly questionable zone to help him out with his problem.





	Beachstuck Striders feat. Dirk's Questionable Ideas and Their Consequences

While the beach was fun on hot, summer days, and it was a great getaway, Dirk always felt left out while his other brothers had fun, either in the water, or in the sand. That was fine. He'd always been more on his own, never really felt the need to socialise much, but did occasionally partake in some familial activities; just like he was right now.

The eldest of his brothers, D, had been building a sand set for his installment of Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff (the bebCh episobe), and Dirk had been helping with littler things. Soon enough, the set covered an even larger area than their little camp, which consisted of three umbrellas and a towel for each of them, plus two bags and a cooler. It was magnificent, but D wasn't going to stop. There were still rocks to be placed meticulously, so that the city he had built could take shape, and Dirk was happy to help him find the perfect candidates.

Just as he was returning from the other side of the beach, hands and swimming trunk pockets full of rocks, he saw it. A seagull padding towards their beautiful creation, curious, with obvious evil and mischief on its miniscule mind. D was nowhere around, probably searching for more rocks. It was time he made a decision. Run and risk the seagull ruining more, or approach it slowly and still risk it ruining more? Another option presented itself then, like a flash of genius. Dirk had weapons. Immediately, without a second thought, he swung a rock at the seagull, still walking closer.

A building was downed. A casualty that he could rebuild, but the seagull was not about to run like a regular chicken. No, this was an advanced chicken.

Dirk threw again and again, but the bird continued through the streets like Godzilla. It was time to bring in the military and the heavy artillery.

Dirk ran right at it when he got close enough and it finally budged, extending its wings and flying off, but not before ruining a few more sand buildings. 

When the smoke cleared, it became obvious that Dirk was in trouble. Half of the brilliant work: demolished. D was going to murder him. And speaking of the devil...

A heartbroken shriek pierced Dirk's ears, then an angry yell, and before he knew it, he was high-tailing it along the shore, with D in hot pursuit. Then, another genius idea: detour into the water, dive, dive, DIVE. D didn't follow, thankfully, but groaned and mourned about the lost work.

Dirk was alone again, a little adrenaline-pumped, but alone.

He couldn't go bother Bro and Dave, they were busy looking at... rocks, or something like that. Which reminded him: he had to dispose of the ones he still had in his pockets. Quickly and efficiently, he lost the dead weight and swam off.

The beach was somewhat of a little bay, so to speak, encased in rocks and low stone cliffs, which broke in interesting formations, almost like layers. If he was guessing correctly, there must be a cave or two somewhere. Okay, maybe not caves, but at least a small, private little cove. It was time to do some exploring on his own.

From where he could see Bro and Dave doing their thing, he headed in the completely opposite direction, to the other end of the beach, until he finally reached the bordering cliff. It was shallow enough to walk beside and peek into the cracked rocks, only to find barnacles and the occasional wad of seaweed. Seaweed was kind of gross, he noted, happy about the fact that there was sand under his feet.

A good few minutes of walking and the beach was out of sight. Another few, and he noticed a thin crevice in the cliff. Explore time? Explore time.

He bravely stepped in, holding onto both walls that now stood on either side of him, only to realise that he was now throwing a shadow into the hole in front of him. A lean to the left, a lean to the right, and he secured his steps, heading deeper in.

Sadly, it ended just as abruptly as it began, but instead of getting out and continuing his exploration, he began to think. This seemed like a pretty nice and secluded spot to chill in. Hell, if he were to sit down, the water would be like a blanket, a little over his chest. It was decided.

He turned around, only to find a sight that made his heart jump into his throat, and then into his stomach. With wide eyes, he watched as a black fin rippled through the water, swimming towards him, until it stopped right in front of the "cave".

Wait. No one ever said anything about sharks in this sea- oh. Dirk's fear immediately disappeared as he sat down into the water, turning into secret embarrassment.

The fin neared him, along with that large, yet slim body that stretched to a full ten feet, until it stopped right in front of him, and the pointed snout raised up and out of the water, enough to show two very black eyes, with a single LED inside them. Dirk felt extremely stupid.

"Hey, Hal," he grumbled, staring at the now very obviously android shark. "I was wondering where you disappeared off to."

"I was going to announce myself, but this was an opportunity I couldn't pass up." The robotic, synthesized voice sounded very much like his own, if he were to take away the reverb, the echo, the pitch correction, smoothed out the whole thing and made it less muffled. Yeah, just like his own.

"You didn't scare me, if that's what you're thinking," Dirk said defensively, but then realised that he might've just confirmed what Hal was going to tell him with that denial.

"And I'm to believe that when your voice oozes denial?" Yep, yeah, there it was.

"I was momentarily startled, that's not the same as scared." Excuses had to be made, but possibly drove the denial in deeper, and buried it in his own grave.

"Dirk, we both know it would hurt your pride if you admitted to being scared. So, I'll do you one better and accept that you were scared without your explicit confirmation," Hal told him, turning his head as best as he could in the narrow space so he could peer at Dirk. Unable to answer that, said Dirk only huffed in response. "May I now inquire as to why D is throwing a fit on the beach and you've exiled yourself to this solitary rock opening?"

"Long story."

"I have nowhere to be. Fish are scared of me, even after I tried making friends with them." Nothing could stop this android from finding out the truth, could it?

"Fine. He was building a set so he could film a special beach episode of Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff, we both went to scour for rocks and when I came back, a seagull decided to shit on our party and ruin it all, but not before disappearing right before D saw me in the ruins of the sand set, pinning the destruction on me and causing D to chase me half-way across the beach until I dove into the water. Exile has led me here. This is now my new home." He gave the right rock wall a little pat for emphasis.

"Fascinating. What do you intend to to here, in this new home?"

It took Dirk exactly three seconds to come up with a response. "Assimilate and become one of the barnacles."

Hal gave a soft, reverb-y laugh. "An improvement. You've been sat alone all day again, haven't you?"

"How do you know?"

"You're talking like D, meaning you must have had some conversation with him. He doesn't go into the water often. And also, your shoulders are red from the sun."

Dirk took a quick look at them, and indeed, they were. He didn't know if he should be embarrassed, so he decided to be secretly embarrassed again. Added it to the first round from before.

"So? You've been alone all day too."

"Except I've actually been doing something."

Touché, shark-Hal. Halshark. Dirk put the secret embarrassment onto his tab and remained silent. So what if he could only survive in a room that was filled with schematics, blueprints, wires and tools and not out on the open beach? It wasn't his idea to come here. Still, it made him frown, just the littlest bit, but it did sour his mood a little, making him sigh after a few moments.

A bump into his leg stirred him from his thoughts.

"What am I supposed to do?" he blurted out, hand instinctively placing itself onto Hal's snout. The outside of his body was covered in durable, somewhat rubbery silicone. The gills were purely aesthetic, not a single drop of water could come through the skin.

Hal poked his head out again. "Relax a little. You're on vacation."

Relax. Now that was a big concept to begin with. He was going to relax in this secluded spot, wasn't he? No, nothing could be as relaxing as his own room.

"How?" he asked.

"Like you always do." Hal backed away for maybe a foot, as if he was trying to swim out and was... hinting at something. His voice sounded... hinting-y.

"No, definitely not," Dirk said reluctantly as he realised what Hal was suggesting. "Dirty-minded shark, get back here." That statement did give him an idea though. A pretty fun idea. A revenge kind of idea.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say all your new-found shark instincts are telling you that you want a sweet little shark lady."

"Dude no." Hal was unamused. But Dirk had to drive it home.

"Oh, a shark gentleman, then?"

"Dirk, I am no barbaric shark. I am a sophisticated entity in the body of a shark," Hal said as if trying to sound smart. It always came to one-upmanship. "If we were going by your logic, that would mean the closest being that could be my mate was a human."

It was then that Dirk realised he'd fucked up on his counter-joke. Hal had him, and Hal had him cornered. As if that wasn't obvious enough, he swam another foot closer to Dirk, to the point where he was overshadowing his legs, which were laid out over the sand.

Does Dirk Strider give up? Of course not. Should he? Maybe, before his embarrassment leaves him bankrupt of all pride. His tab is filling.

"But a human couldn't possibly mate with a shark, everyone's scared of you." This could prove to be a disastrous comment.

"They'd also need knowledge of robotic shark bodies, Dirk."

A quick disaster it was. Dirk was left silent, having slipped up on his second attempt to retaliate. Maybe hanging with D all day wasn't such a good idea. Or maybe he should think over his words more.

"Don't bring me into this," he warned, glaring at Hal, who just wiggled closer through the water.

"Did I press a button, Dirk? This shouldn't affect you so much, if it was only a joke." He's looming. As best as he can being in the water, lower than Dirk. Still, he's much bigger, and indeed, looming. His stature was breaking, knees weak, palms sweaty, but being washed by the water immediately.

"Are you still suggesting I relax?" he asked boldly, placing both his hands on the snout to keep Hal at a somewhat safe distance from himself.

"By all means. However, now we've taken a dip into the questionable zone. Are you brave enough to explore it?" This android just kept on pushing and prodding. "You did build me true-to-life."

Shit, he did. Save for the gills, everything else was the same as on a regular shark. Other people might not notice the details, but Dirk went into them. There wasn't any reason before, but he was starting to think that Hal had been wanting to exploit the features since day one.

"Are you?" The question pressed on. He could back out, if he wanted. Did he want to back out was the real question though. Years of curiosity were weighing him down, years of looking at various questionable pieces of media and certain _fandoms_ were all boiling and bubbling down to this. This one moment in his life after he'd built a much too detailed robot shark body for an AI that he'd created as well. Did he, in all honesty, from the deepest part of his brain, his heart, his stomach, ~~his nethers,~~ want to back out?

"I am." His reply was murmured, but murmured determinedly.

"I never doubted it," Hal said and if he could, he would be grinning. "Besides, as if I don't know about your weird kinks."

"Kinks are nothing I should be ashamed of." Yes you should be, he told himself in his head. His self-loathing had two voices, one in his head, and Hal. Both sounded very much the same.

"Sure, sure," Hal trailed off, then dove under the water again to out-maneuver the hands holding his snout, which he then slowly dragged up Dirk's thigh, getting it into the leg of his trunks until it couldn't fit more.

Dirk figured there wasn't any time to ask questions, given that they couldn't talk while Hal was under the water anyway, so he made a move to start untying the string that acted as a belt, and then shimmied out of the one piece of clothing. Time was of the essence here, and his dignity was out the hole he was currently residing in. It had no windows yet, so.

That snout pressed against his crotch quite immediately and he couldn't help but grab onto Hal's head. Thankfully, the rubbery, rough skin made it easy to hold on as Hal kept on rubbing himself against Dirk's groin, trying to loosen him up and get him hard, making him gasp with a more sudden press. It was at that point that Dirk, for a second time, realised something. 

The rock walls echoed. Not much, but they echoed.

He bit on his lip to keep a tight seal on his mouth, reaching down between them to push at Hal a few times, wanting to talk to him. Thankfully, his wish was granted, and Hal resurfaced after a moment.

"This isn't going to do much," Dirk told him after releasing his lip from his teeth. "Here, just- you know what I like."

Slowly, he shifted a little further back into the cave so he was a little further out of the water, sand scratching at his bare skin, to which he paid no mind and leaned back. He patted his stomach invitingly.

"You disgust me," Hal commented, but settled onto him, head on Dirk's chest and the weight of his mechanical, yet light body giving Dirk that sweet, delicious physical contact that he constantly wanted.

Dirk paused for a moment, face to face with Hal. Or, well, face to snout. After a few more seconds of hesitation, he placed a soft smooch right onto the tip of it, being met with silence. No insults? No comment about how much of a degenerate he was? It was like a green light to him, and he added a second one and a third one.

Without thinking, Dirk reached down, hand subconsciously wrapping around the length of his semi, while he kept on kissing at the wet shark snout, throwing in some variety after a minute and licking at it. Salty, like the ocean and the attitude. His hand moved lazily, still adjusting to the fact that he was officially about to bone (or be boned by) Hal in shark form.

Of course, it didn't take very long until he was fully hard, almost passionately placing kisses along the large mouth. Do sharks have lips? I don't think they have lips. Hal did have pretty teeth showing, very pretty teeth. Dirk gave those some attention too, feeling them over with his tongue and his still-free hand.

"You do know I'm just laid here on top of you." It stirred him from his few minutes of enjoyment, eyes opening from half-lidded to wide in a second.

"Sorry."

"You're a desperate fuck, you know that?" There's Hal's kink, there it is. Was wondering where it went.

"If you're so keen on calling me that, how do you plan on proceeding?" Dirk said, quite defensively as well. After all, it was a good question. How the hell was he going to position himself?

"You built me just like a shark," Hal stated, as if that hadn't been said before. "Now all you have to do is bring up the memory of how sharks mate."

Dirk was officially starting to blush. He looked that up for science, he had to so he would know how their bodies work, he regretted it, but he was thankful for it now. Secretly. "Semi-sideways? You're going to have to turn onto your side."

"Clever boy, look at you." Was that another jab at Dirk's kinks? Of course it was. And the voice it was said in was dripping with praise. Hal then slowly backed off of Dirk, giving his cock a light nuzzle while he was sliding down as well. Needless to say, Dirk's whole body twitched.

"I have to stretch." He knew just how big he'd made those claspers, and he wasn't taking any risks. To people who have not done their research, that's the name for a shark's hemipenes, plural. Clasper: singular. Not to mention, Hal was probably enough of a dick to jam both of them inside.

"Well, get on with it. You might have not noticed, or you might not remember, but as a synthetic shark, I don't have opposable thumbs or any other type of finger. I think all I can do is watch," Hal said and backed away for another foot. Dirk's cheeks went red again as he reminded himself that he, indeed, had to stretch himself while being watched intensely.

This would prove to be harder than he thought, because he couldn't bring his saliva further than maybe half an inch under the water, which meant lubrication was out of the question. However, a small snag like that wasn't going to stop him. Determinedly, Dirk reached down between his legs, further than before, of course, and leaned back until the water was covering his shoulders. The positioning was awkward, especially in a narrow cave that was filled with water, not to mention that his current partner couldn't move anywhere BUT the water.

His fingers circled around his ass, carefully poking at the hole while Hal lowered himself down under the water, resting on the sand and enjoying the show. The tip of the dorsal fin remained peeking out, letting Dirk know just how up-close he was being watched. Slowly, he pushed his index past the rim, holding himself still and above water with his other arm braced against the sand. It was easy to take, albeit a bit strange while under the water. The added pressure of it, trying to spill into him each time he pushed his finger in and pulled it out, immediately earned a tiny, muffled whine.

Dirk took a quick breath to calm himself, head laid back into the water. All he could hear now was the hum of the ocean and his own breathing. It was somewhere between sensory deprivation and overload, and he was only at one finger.

The second one was harder to wriggle in without feeling the cold press of water inside him, making his muscles tighten up before he even got the tips of his fingers inside. He breathed in sharply, willing himself to relax and embrace the feeling. After prodding and pushing for another few seconds, he plunged the fingers into himself forcefully, bringing himself to grunt.

His muscles tightened and released between thrusts, the occasional drop of water leaking into him as he worked himself open, painfully aware that Hal was still watching him from a very close distance. He'll get called squeamish later, he knew it.

How much more did he have to add to be able to take Hal though? If he remembered correctly from his blueprints, his claspers came in at about a foot long and relatively thick. Comfort would have to be given up eventually, he guessed, but three fingers should be a minimum requirement.

Dirk pushed on bravely.

When he pulled the two out, he made sure to tighten down, lest he wanted water rushing into his ass. Not that he didn't like the feeling, the problem was getting it out afterwards. He bunched his ring finger up with the first two, then began to push them in, whining through the quick sting of pain and wriggling them until they were in all the way to his knuckles.

At that point, he wanted nothing more than to just get off, or at least that was what his dick was telling him. Dirk, master of control over himself, yet a complete slut for losing it, overpowered the need to simply jerk his cock until it was over and he could go back to the beach. No, he was going to get fucked by a shark, that was final. Eventually, he pulled his fingers out, sloppy job done and he sat up again, able to hear the rest of his environment. Hal surfaced a moment after.

"Are you sure you're done?" he asked, actually concerned about injuring Dirk if he wasn't relaxed enough. As much as he loved telling him how he'd like to dismember him on the best of days, this was a little more than just shitty insults. It was about an enjoyable day at the beach, or a very, very awkward trip to the nearest hospital.

"I'll be fine if you take it easy. I know actual sharks are rough, but you can control it," Dirk replied, idly rubbing his fingers against his ass. It was soothing, to say the least. And in comparison of what was yet to come.

"As you wish," Hal said, then gently pushed himself closer to Dirk and tipped onto his side. "Familiarise yourself."

To even get close enough to Hal's pelvic fin, Dirk had to move further down quite a bit, all the while holding onto the large body beside him, feeling over the artificial skin. The underside was light grey, in contrast to the nearly pitch black everywhere else (Dirk remembered exactly how much of a pain it was to colour it like that), with a few barely visible seams along the fins, and a long one that went down the exact middle. He knew every detail of Hal's body, to the last groove and component.

After he was done inspecting, Dirk turned his attention to the pelvic fins and the two identical claspers protruding from them. It was somewhat humorous, Hal always had his dicks on display. That thought remained in Dirk's head for another moment, before he reached under the surface and, a little shyly, slid his palm over one of them, from fin to tip. It felt soft, yet firm, the texture and feeling somewhat reminiscent of a regular silicone dildo, except a dildo didn't make him question his life choices.

It momentarily startled Dirk when Hal flexed the one he was touching, slowly turning it almost a full hundred and eighty degrees. Unsurprisingly, it left Dirk's stomach fluttering as he kept feeling it over, taking a hold of it with both hands and dragging them across the length. Why did he build this? Why did he give Hal an exact replica of a shark's body when he could have optimised it? Probably because he was a masochist.

"Enjoying yourself?" Hal interrupted, wiggling his clasper in Dirk's hands.

Dirk didn't answer, too embarrassed to do so and preoccupied with jerking him off. The movement he could achieve was fascinating even him, the creator of it, not to mention raised a question if _everything_ worked correctly. Oh, no. He didn't skimp out on the details. Not Dirk Strider.

"I'll take it as a yes." It was quite obvious anyway.

Hal turned the second clasper as well, Dirk taking the opportunity to grab it. He now had both hands full of artificial shark penis. Not that he was going to complain over it, but it was a funny thought.

Speaking of thoughts, he had another one. Very carefully, Dirk shifted to lie down alongside Hal, hands still holding onto his claspers and he then slowly dipped his head under the water and gave the tips a light kiss. On the same breath, he trailed more kisses down the length of the one he held in his left hand, before coming up for air and repeating the process on the right one. However it worked, it was helping him relax and work Hal up at the same time.

"Should we do it?" he asked after coming up again and shaking his head to get his hair out of his face, letting go of Hal's shark cocks.

"If you're ready." Hal shifted slightly, now pressed against the rock wall to give Dirk room to move and position himself. "Line it up, it's already hard to aim as it is."

After a bit of thinking, Dirk decided that the best position in the current situation would be chest to... underside, so he could hold onto Hal for support when it got rough. He wrapped his arms around him as best as he could, eventually settling for holding onto his dorsal fin with his right hand to keep himself steady while reaching back with the other until he could feel the eager clasper twitch as it was touched again.

Carefully, he pulled the tapered tip to his ass and pushed himself down on it, gritting his teeth as it stretched him open dryly. He was fine. He just had to take it nice and easy, which was exactly what he was doing. Once it was held by his muscles, he used the now-free hand to hold himself up by bracing it against the sand as he kept moving himself down, further onto the thicker and thicker length and struggled to keep his noises to minimal whimpers. Hal kept still for him, which he was thankful for.

Until he patted his tummy that was.

Hal immediately tensed up, bending his body as best as he could to thrust into Dirk sharply, jamming the clasper into him roughly and making him dig his nails into his skin and grab a handful of rough sand. It didn't stop there. The motion was repeated, another shove of Hal's mock-hips that earned a pained cry when Dirk felt the long appendage grind deeper into him.

Come to think of it, those weren't actual genitalia, just-

"Hal, _slow down_!" he begged through another sob, trying to pull away for a little bit of mercy before he was thoroughly ruined at the very beginning. "Shit- shit, that hurts, you asshole."

"Oh, so sorry, I don't possess any type of anatomy that could help me regulate literally any aspect of it. I don't have hips, I don't have arms to hold you. I don't even have a regular dick, but that's not my fault, is it?" He was practically hissing at him, but did pull himself back a little bit. "If this was just like real sharks, I'd have to bite your arm and shove you into a reef where a current passes by so that I could breathe, then mercilessly have my way. Believe me, I'm doing my best."

Guilt got to Dirk quickly, and he sighed shakily, but snuggled closer to Hal. "Sorry. I was too eager. Stay still while I try again."

"What a fucking wonder you are."

Despite how annoyed Hal sounded, he stayed still, even though he didn't really like being commanded. Dirk slid himself up the clasper, then back down, until he got into a slow rhythm and managed to relax enough to somewhat smoothly take more of it. This was officially his largest toy, and he was fitting it deeper than he thought he himself was. He could feel it stretching him open and filling every little space between his muscles, until the full weight of it rested just below his stomach, fin pressing against his ass.

"Move," he garbled, eyes unfocused and just blankly staring at the black and grey skin he was pressed against.

Just as before, Hal bent and thrust, just the tiniest bit less violently, except this time, Dirk felt the whole length shift inside him, as if jostling his stomach. Come to think of it, he might as well have been, because when Dirk reached down to try and grab his cock, Hal thrust again, just as his palm trailed over his stomach, and he *felt* the clasper underneath. Another thrust and Dirk was assured that it was distending his lower abdomen. And it felt just as amazing as the sight of it was.

This time, Dirk didn't complain. He let Hal thrust however he wanted, only focusing on keeping himself above the water and enjoying himself. Wanting to jerk himself was forgotten, his hand stayed on his stomach to feel Hal when he pushed in and press down on it, which stirred him further and made himself groan into his skin. The shoving soon had a rhythm, an increasingly rough one, lifting a few particles of sand around Hal's large body and giving Dirk a real exercise as he kept trying to hold himself up.

But then, Hal had a brilliant idea. Sharks used one clasper at a time, but what prevented him from using both? Exactly, nothing.

"Dirk, get off and line them both up," he commanded, stirring Dirk from his current state after he stopped thrusting. He didn't reply, too dumb-founded by the words, but Hal wasn't having it. "Both of them, Dirk. You've played with thicker toys, this shouldn't come as a surprise."

"I'm not stretched enough-"

"Take your time." He wasn't going to give him a way to excuse himself. No, this was for... research. Hal wanted to see just how Dirk would react to having so much inside him, hear him moan, watch him squirm. Or, at the very least, feel the squirming.

Carefully, Dirk pulled himself up and off, shuddering when the tip slid out and left him empty, but a second clasper quickly joined its side, by the feel of it. After getting over the initial hesitation, he pressed the tips in easily, trying to squeeze them as close together as he could.

Just like before, he rocked his hips up and down, but this time, much slower after he came to a point where the claspers stretched him further. Deep breaths. He took deep breaths and made slow grinds against them, inching them in, cramming and fitting them into himself tightly. At only half, Dirk already felt like he was too full, but knew he had room to spare, he only needed to relax first.

"You alright?" Hal asked all of a sudden, surprising even Dirk with the concern for his well-being.

"I'm- yeah. I'm alright," Dirk mumbled, stopping his movements and shifting awkwardly to get into a better position. His knee was braced in the sand, just like his hand, and he pulled it up a bit to try and have his legs spread more. "Could you pull back and push in?"

"Gently?"

"Please."

As requested, Hal did just as he was told, very gently backing himself up and then jerking forward to push deeper into Dirk. It helped, a little uncomfortably, but it helped, and he rocked along with him, grinding down onto the claspers after relaxing his muscles. The closeness contributed as well.

Before Dirk even knew it, both of the pelvic fins were cupping his ass, loosely rippling with the waves, and the bump in his stomach was back, even larger than before. Finally, he remembered just how bad he wanted to get off and how much his cock ached, pressed between their bodies, dusted light red at the tip.

He took a slow, steadying breath and gave Hal's stomach another pat.

To no surprise, Hal began to shove and writhe, Dirk barely managing to keep his noises under control. It was still painful to be stretched around so much, but he took it, he grit his teeth and powered through it as Hal established the pace again; rough and escalating. His entire body rocked along with the thrusts, he felt the clasper tips press and push at the inside of his abdomen with each one. His stability was quickly breaking, but it wasn't like he cared at this point.

Until a particularly hard thrust, which knocked him off of the sand and under the water. With the hold he had on the fins, he pulled Hal with him as well, which meant that he was now completely submerged, android shark above him and shoving him into the coarse sand with his back. Dirk could only complain about the sudden lack of oxygen, but that was quickly solved when he managed to pull himself up just enough to peek his face out of the water, take another deep breath and plunge back underneath.

This time, he held his breath for a long while, squirming under Hal's underside and trying to grind his cock against him as best as he could, given that he needed his hands to hold on. Light-headedness set in, coupled with the rest of the experience, Dirk felt like he was losing all senses again. He wasn't an idiot though, and just before his lungs began to burn, resurfaced again, only to rinse and repeat with a fresh fill of oxygen.

Dirk didn't know how long Hal kept the thrusting up, he didn't count how many times he gasped for air, but it left his head spinning. The rough treatment continued and he was completely relaxed with the large intrusions inside him now easily sliding along his walls, pressing into every little spot, stretching out every tiny nook as they kept getting rammed into him repeatedly. 

When his orgasm took him, it moved just like they were moving; sharp jolts that spread like waves, shaking Dirk from the waist up and instinctively constricting the muscles around the claspers as he twitched and arched his back to press his chest against Hal's belly. The cum was washed away immediately, mixing into the water until it disappeared without a trace. Dirk felt heavenly, completely relaxed as he went to take another breath of air.

Even after he finished though, the thrusting didn't stop. In fact, they might as well have sped up. Hal _wanted_ him to release first, he realised, so he could overstimulate him to the point of having him scream under the water.

And he had him at the perfect point now.

Dirk was barely able to hold his breath as Hal lowered him down even more, digging him a hole into the sand at this rate as he shoved him into it so roughly. He fought to get a simple gasp of air, clawing at Hal until he pulled up a little, letting Dirk breathe before slamming him right back against the sand. It left very obvious marks on his back, some even drawing blood, like an equivalent of scratch marks.

After Hal reduced him to what could be considered a weak rag doll, he finally allowed himself to release as well. His orgasm was all about programming, and sure, his processor did get a little zap out of it, but the rest of it was just pumping artificial jizz into whatever subject was on the ends of his claspers. Yeah, Dirk had thought of everything.

The load was pretty large, huge compared to Dirk's, filling him for a good, long minute, until he could feel it sloshing around in his stomach, accentuating the bump that the claspers made by further distending his abused tummy. Well, water getting into him wasn't that big of an issue any more, was it?

Slowly, Hal pulled out of him with a quick buck of his body, cum immediately spurting out as soon as the claspers were out. Dirk lifted himself up, finally able to breathe again, arms squeezing his stomach to get all of it cleared up. Not a foreign sensation, but so much weirder while he was in the water. Hal just watched, poking his head out of the water when he was done.

"You could have warned me before doing _any_ of that," Dirk said with a huff, then hissed as he felt the sting of the tiny scratches the sand left on his back and ass. "Jesus fuck- _ow_."

"It wouldn't have been half as fun if I did," Hal practically purred at him, then batted his tail to push himself closer to Dirk and nuzzle his stomach. "I don't feel pleasure like you do, so I had to improvise."

Dirk paused for a little, then slid a hand down his snout to pet him. "... Thanks. For helping out."

"I'll take that as a compliment for me. Not to mention a confirmation that you're now a certified shark-fucker."

"Dude-" Dirk swatted at his snout that he was petting just moments before. "Let's just keep this to ourselves, please?"

"Oh, you have my word." Hal wiggled like a happy, satisfied little dog. Big dog, actually.

"Thank yo-"

"But I'm not sure if you have theirs."

Dirk furrowed his brows at Hal, then looked up, spotting two silhouettes at the entrance to the crevice, giggling and snorting. Bro and Dave, who else.

Dirk managed to quickly find his swimming trunks, jammed into a crack in the rocks and pulled them on, then scrambled to explain and beg them to not tell D, whatever they did, just not tell D. Stuck with a month of grocery shopping and washing dishes after they got back, he managed to bargain his secrecy. It was something, at the very least.

Until he would ask Hal to help him relax again.

**Author's Note:**

> I know more about shark anatomy than I ever wanted to know.


End file.
